ARABIAN: Someone else do it. It might get my silky mane dirty and besides, who's gonna read me the instructions?
QUARTER HORSE: Oh for Pete's Sake, give me the damn bulb and let's be done with it.
SHETLAND: Give it to me. I'll kill it and we won't have to worry about it anymore.
FRIESIAN: I would, but I can't see where I'm going from behind all this hair.
BELGIAN: Put the Shetland on my back, maybe he can reach it then.
WARMBLOOD: Doesn't anyone realize that I was sold for $75K as a yearling, but only because my hocks are bad, otherwise I would be worth $100K? I am NOT changing lightbulbs. I will delegate the changing of the lightbulb to my personal groom after he finishes shampooing my mane and cleaning my saddle.
MORGAN: Me! Me! Me! Pleeease let me! I wanna do it! I'm gonna do it! I know how, really I do! Just watch! I'll even rewire the barn afterward.
APPALOOSA: Ya'll are a bunch of losers. We don't need to change the lightbulb, I ain't scared of the dark. And someone make that damn Morgan stop jumping up and down before I double barrel him.
HAFLINGER: That thing I ate was a lightbulb?
MUSTANG: Lightbulb? Let’s go on a trail ride, instead. And camp. Out in the open like REAL horses.
LIPIZANNER: Hah, amateurs. I will change the lightbulb. Not only that, but I will do it while standing on my hind legs and balancing it on my nose, after which I will perform seven one tempis and a capriole. Can you do that? Huh? Huh? Didn’t think so.
MINIATURE: I bet you think I can’t do it just cause I’m small. You know what that is? It’s sizeism!
PAINT: Put all the lightbulbs in a pen, tell me which one you want, and my owner will bet you twenty bucks I can get it before the quarter horse.
POA: I’m not changing it. I’m the one who kicked the old one and broke it in the first place, remember? Now, excuse me, I have a grain room to break into.
PERCHERON: Guys? Um, guys? I hope you don’t mind, but while you were all arguing I went ahead and changed it. Then I changed all the other light bulbs in the barn so I don't have to hear you all whine about it for a while.
No comments:
Post a Comment